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Monday, December 3, 2012

Cookie Cutter Relationship Advice


I am hardly one to speak on relationships and their status whatever they may or may not be on the internet and the various social media platforms, but i just thought I would respond to the above just real quick. There are so many nuggets of love wisdom from all kinds of internet, but a lot of people, especially the ones that welcome it ALL with no filters, who do not know themselves are just being swayed by information that is not relevant or even useful to their situations or even potential relationships in the future. Not ALL advice is good advice because not ALL advice is for you so with that said I saw the above image on the internet and I was mildly and bemusingly (?) annoyed. People are starting speaking careers and whole ministries around peddling what worked for them in their individual situations and with their unique personalities and circumstances. What someone experiences in their MARRIAGE is not what you need for your RELATIONSHIP (gf/bf/dating/whatever). Y'all better keep yourselves quenched with self-awareness and knowing thyself or else you will fall for anything especially when it comes to relationships. On the one hand I say go ahead and start your business and make your money however you want to as long as there are customers, but customers please read the label and know your own allergies. So I tweeked the message a bit:

Don't be sad if a relationship ended and it was YOUR choice. Why would you want to be with someone you don't see a future with? Let's be honest -- people get into relationships [and marry] with who they WANT to be with and if after so long STILL wonder what "could be, should be, would be" -- settle this truth in your heart: They are most likely just NOT for you and that is OK. There are signs everywhere, but God won't close the door FOR you if you want to remain blinded by what you think and hope is love. God is much more concerned about YOUR PURPOSE than changing your maiden name and HE knew that man would never love you quite like He does - so you better get on board too! 


You have to own your relationships and decisions that you make for yourself and yes if what someone else decides for or about you is mutually favorable then yes - go for it! But please ladies, especially if you are single, listening to too much of this advice from people that don't know you, the person you are dating or your life - take it all with a huge rock of salt. Think for yourself see your relationship for what it is and is NOT in it's own context or at the very least in the context of your own relationship history instead of that of someone who is a completely different woman with a man that is nothing like what you even like. Do some deciding and some choosing of your own instead of "tryna get chose" :) - it's ok!

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*@afropolitaine*

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